Kim Kardashian's Marriage, William McKinley's Second Term, and a Red Blood Cell's Life Span

What do all these things have in common? Well, they all are shorter than the amount of time I have lived in NYC. On December 1st, I officially have lived in NYC for 6 months. Wowza!! These six months have flown by! I cannot believe how quickly life up here has become the norm and how easily God has made this transition for me. So here are a few things that I have done/experienced over the past 6 months:

1. The NYC Seasons: I lived in one of the hottest summers of my whole life and (miraculously) survived. And then there was Fall. Oh. My. Word. Gorgeous! The fall colors in Central Park? Breathtaking. Also, Fall lasted about 2.1 seconds. And now on to Winter. Where I am now. The wind is RIDICULOUS! I'm just waiting for a girl with red slippers and a dog named Todo to show up. I did experience my first snow the other day. Beautiful!! I can't wait for a big snow where it covers the streets!!

2. Holidays: I had my first birthday and first Thanksgiving away from my family. I missed them very much and it makes me cherish and appreciate when we do get to spend time together. I had some friends from TN spend time in the city over Thanksgiving. We got to see the parade (AMAZING) and have an amazing Friendsgiving feast before I worked on Thanksgiving night.

3. Spanish: My Spanish vocabulary has grown exponentially since moving here. I still can't hold a conversation or even ask what the weather is but I have learned many useful words especially related to my profession. Medicina para dolor in cabasa. No hablo espanol. Un piquinto sangre. (Yep I know I butchered the spelling and grammar of those. That's some East TN Spanglish for you!)

4. 65 miles: This is the distance I have walked to and from work alone (not including everywhere else) since living here. I walk most of the places I go and definitely have adjusted to life without a car.

5. Brooklyn: I love Brooklyn!! It is such a pretty part of the city and if I were rich beyond compare, I could totally see myself living in Dumbo. I love Brooklyn for many reasons (including one of my besties lives there). Everyone should experience L&B Spumoni Gardens pizza before you die. Seriously the best in the whole city!!!

6. Membership: I joined a church here in the city and am beyond blessed by the community of believers. CCF has taught me what community looks like, how family-away-from-family feels, and what Jesus really meant by "Go and make disciples". I can't say enough about my church and friends I have made there.

7. Friends: I am seriously so blessed in this department. Who knew the first girl I talked to about bible study at church would end up becoming my best friend? Who knew that a random lunch after church with another girl would end up blossoming in to a friendship with someone who is seriously the New York version of me? Who knew that the first guy I talked to at church would end up working with me and I would seriously be so blessed by our friendship? Who knew that the 2 girls that my bestie lives with would become very dear friends to me and 2 girls who I seriously look up to? Who knew that a mother of 3 from Jersey would end up bringing me in to her world and discipling me in my walk with Christ? Who knew that a pint-sized girl from Queens would seriously make me laugh harder and love deeper than most others? Who knew that 2 houses of guys would love on me and my sisters in Christ and show me what Biblical manhood looks like lived out in NYC? Who knew that a girl from Jersey who takes the bus weekly to the Heights would touch my heart and teach me about passion for Christ? Who knew that a nurse from SoHo would keep me sane during my crazy shifts at work and become a bestie almost immediately? Who knew my Jamaican beauty from Queens would teach me about relaxing and taking life in strides? God knew. Before I moved here. Before I even thought about moving here. I could go on and on and on about all the people in my life that have shaped me and molded me here in NYC. I love all of them dearly and can't remember what my life was like before them. Jesus is good. So so good.

8. Deaths: Since moving here, I have had 2 family members and my guinea pig die. While I was of course deeply saddened, I learned that God is the supplier of many things, including peace and comfort. I am thankful I got to go to TN for a few days after one of deaths.

There have been so many other places and moments and emotions I have experienced here that I cannot find words for at this time. I am so beyond blessed for this chapter in my life. I love all the people and experiences I have lived. And its only been 6 months. I can't wait for what the next 6 months-even 6 years- here hold!

It Don't Matter If You're Black or White

So it has been quite a while since I have posted on here (sorry) but I have been super busy (a good thing) and I have been contemplating this post for some time. Most of you read the title and weren't surprised. If you know me at all, you know my intense love for all things Michael Jackson. And how apropos on the 50th anniversary of MLK's "I Have a Dream" speech. But I feel like this is something that needs to be said.

So being completely honest, when I moved here I had a HUGE culture shock. I mean not only the physical environment but the people and culture and just general way of life. As I have previously said, I moved to an area predominantly of the Hispanic culture and particularly Dominican. *Disclaimer: I am super blessed to live in a community filled with literally every background, race, and culture but it is primarily Hispanic.* I'll tell you what I have learned in just my 3 short months of living here about this culture.

1. They love. Their love is loud. Their love is infectious. Their love is defensive. Their love is like a love I never felt in TN. Not that my parents and friends weren't this way but a whole community? Nope. I have felt love and help like never before.

2. They are super family-oriented. Everyone is family whether by blood or by location or whatever else. Everyone is family. I love it. I feel very included and loved. My absolute most favorite thing in the whole world is when the owner of the laundromat I go to calls me "Mami". He is this super cute little old man who wears suspenders and a boaters hat and he looks out for me. I sincerely melt every time he calls me that because I feel like he is treating me like a family member and friend (except when he tells me 800 times to check to see if the dryer is on before I assume it is and waste time. Although really I think it is just he feels bad for me wasting my time sitting there.)

3. Their food is DELICIOUS! I have made a bunch of friends who have introduced me to true Dominican food and let me tell you: YUM!!! I believe my taste buds must be Dominican. 90% of the dishes I've had I couldn't tell you the names but so stinkin delicious!

4. They need Jesus. This is nothing specific to the Dominican community. This is every community. We all need Jesus. We need Him to come pull us up out of our sinful mess, clean us up like only He can, and change us so He ultimately gets all the glory.

As you can see, this community was perfectly made to woo my heart. But when I first moved here, I felt so out of place I couldn't see it for all its glory. (Here's where I get really honest). Being the minority here was something I really struggled with. I think everyone here knew that I was struggling with this too. I had no idea why I was suddenly so aware of my race. And then I started to get so mad that people treated me differently because I was white (or so I thought). I literally would be so aware everywhere I was of my race. I even got to the point where I was sad/angry that I was white and wanted to be Hispanic so I could fit in.

I am so thankful for the people God put in my life during this time to speak truth about the situation to me. One conversation in particular really changed my thinking. This person told me to stop trying to be like everyone else. God made me who I am for a reason and the color I am for a reason and the background I am for a reason and even my Tennessee twang for a reason. This person told me to stop trying to fit everyone in to one little box but instead embrace everyone's differences and learn from them. How dull if we all were the exact same! Reminds me of 1 Corinthians 12:12-31. We can't all be a foot or a hand. We need eachother and we need our differences!

And then I was reading and Jesus said the exact right thing (as He always does).

Psalm 139:13-14 "For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well."

I am perfectly made as me because of God's great works. I am so thankful that God made me so uncomfortable or else I might never have faced this issue. I am so thankful I live in a community as diverse as I do. I am thankful that I have brothers and sisters in Christ who not only celebrate our differences but also the one uniting factor, Jesus.

I pray this post enlightens you and maybe spurs something in you. I literally can't thank God enough for sending me here and letting me find some of the funniest, coolest, greatest friends who I know I can call family as well. And as always, I thank God for sending His son to die for my messy, dirty, rotten, undeserving life.

Happiness and Hot Flashes

“Happiness is only real when shared" -Jon Krakauer, Into The Wild

I absolutely LOVE this quote! I am experiencing a happiness that I haven't known before and all I want to do is share it with you! Since the last time I have posted, God has been working so much in my heart and life. There are so many ways that God has revealed himself to me!.

I have been getting to know a lot more people at church and am actually starting to make some friends at church. There are a couple of girls who have been so welcoming and have really been so kind. Last week, a pipe in my apartment burst and they had to tear down the wall in my bathroom, remove my toilet, and turn off my water. No big deal had I been in TN where I can stay with my parents or one of my friends. Here, I didn't really know anybody and didn't have anywhere to stay. I called one of the girls I've become friends with and she basically welcomed me with open arms and no time limit. What a blessing! So yes, the pipe bursting was inconvenient and scary but what a blessing it was! I got to see how hospitable and caring this girl is.

I have been going to a bible study that really has been such a blessing. The Lord is working in the lives of everyone that attends and is challenging me in every aspect of my life. These people love you but don't let you stay in your sin. They constantly encourage openness and confession with each other (which is totally the way it should be in a community).

I have started work as well. Lots and lots of learning and classes have been happening. I am so excited to really get in the swing of things. I know this job is going to challenge me but I am so excited to see how God is going to work in the lives of me and my co-workers!

So in regards to the title of this post, I am so happy living here. But let me tell you, summers in NYC are so unbearably hot. It is so muggy and hot at all hours of the day (example: It's 11:00 at night and 77 degrees outside). I have permanently decided that I will not look nice anywhere I go because I just sweat all the time. Is this TMI?

I had my "I-Am-A-True-New-Yorker-Now" moment the other day. I had gone to Times Square to meet a friend from home for dinner. On my way back, I was asked by 2 different people about the subway and directions. And I actually knew the answer!! It really is the little things.

I want to close this post with encouragement for all of you. I have learned that God will use things that we would see as inconvenient or even suffering and turn them in to blessings. We don't understand why we go through things but God never promised that we wouldn't face adversity but that He would be there for us through it all. I pray that whatever you are going through in your life, no matter how big or small it may seem to you, look to God. He is there. He wants you to grow and lean on Him. And He will use your suffering to draw others to Christ as well. So instead of constantly questioning and fighting the suffering, I encourage you to pray and seek Christ. But I also encourage you who may not be suffering right now to look to those around you to see how you can help. Be thankful that God is allowing this time for you but I encourage you not to get comfortable in the comfort but to reach out to those in need. And please know that if you are needing something or needing prayer, please don't hesitate to ask!

Please don't see the above statements and think that I am suffering. God is blessing me in ways I could never have imagined. I have definitely had rough days and days where I have missed my family and friends tremendously but I know that God is using this time in my life to shape and mold me. I am truly happy and am so thankful for Christ and the promise of the Gospel!

The Process of Becoming Different

"The Process of Becoming Different." That is the Wikipedia definition for change. Never has there been a truer definition for my life. I am becoming different. I am living somewhere different and can already tell there are differences about myself. I want to apologize in advance because this post won't be as serious as my past posts but there have been too many experiences for me not to share (And don't worry, I'll get serious at the end).

APARTMENT LIVING
When moving in to an old building, there are many things that someone from the south needs to consider. Central heating and air...doesn't exist. Air conditioners and fans will be your best friends. I remember summers past where its been so hot that you're sticky and you jump in the pool just to gain some relief. Not here. Its a humidity that I'm not used to so sticky is definitely applicable but a pool? Yep, I've got a bathtub and that's about it. Oh, and Manhattan is an island so there is that water if you are wanting to get every disease known to man by dipping your left big toe in the water.

Another challenge living in an apartment here is the plugs. Sounds silly but grounded plugs didn't exist "pre-war". My bedroom has 1 outlet with 2 plugs. Having to become a minimalist. (Haha that's what I call a "first world problem").

THE SUBWAY
This is by far my most favorite thing about NYC. I know I am weird but if you want to know the culture, people, beliefs, hopes, family structures, etc of NY, ride the subway. There have been so many interesting and different types of people that I have seen/met on the subway. Learning the subway system has not been as bad as I thought it would be. I have become best friends with the "HopStop" app but there have been many times I have not used any sort of app or map to find my way around. My subway line has a guy who dresses like Michael Jackson and puts on performances every day on the subway with his boombox and costumes.

I want to do a photo series called "Subway Snoozers". It amazes me how fast and in what ways people fall asleep on the subway. It also amazes me that people know exactly when their stop is and wake up just as the subway stops at their station. I also want to gain the confidence to stand on the subway without holding on to the rails. I fall forward all the time when the train stops/goes unexpectedly so for now I try to sit as much as possible. In my eyes, real New Yorkers sleep and stand without holding on on the subway.

WASHINGTON HEIGHTS
When most people think NYC, they don't think Washington Heights. They think Theater District or Central Park or 5th Ave or even Wall Street but not Washington Heights. It is very different than anything I could have expected. This place has stolen my heart but in a way I could have never imagined. If you all know me, you know I am someone who loves diversity and different cultures. And boy is that true of here! This area is mostly of a Dominican culture. 95% of the people here speak Spanish and most of them speak it as a first or only language. There are some Asian and African American cultures represented here but mostly its Dominican.

I love love love this diversity! I love walking down the street and seeing so many different types of people. This has brought about many challenges and blessings. It has been difficult to live somewhere where I don't speak the same language as many of the people. And between my accent and theirs, it often times turns in to a "what did you say" stand off. God is using this to teach me that I am not in control and that I will have to rely on others. One example of this was a couple of days ago when my mother and I went in to a bakery to order a special dessert. The lady behind the counter didn't speak any English and we tried to count and point to what we wanted. This sweet little old man and lady came beside us and translated. The woman talked a little with my mother and the man had a little conversation with us. If I had spoken Spanish, would those conversations have happened? Would I have realized that one way to meet and love these people in Washington Heights is actually depending on THEM for help? (And don't worry, I plan on learning Spanish by both osmosis and conversationally.)

I thank God daily for this opportunity and am so overwhelmed that He loves me enough to come before me here and establish a home for me. I am thankful that I am learning more about Him and His people all over the world. I am thankful that even though this whole process is new and scary, His presence is making the transition possible and enjoyable.

THE CHURCH
I have only been to church once but already can sense that God is using these people to do something great in this city. Everyone was so welcoming and inviting and you can tell that they sincerely love Christ. Its so refreshing to be around a group of people who love the Lord in a city that has put money, fame, and power before Him. I love this quote by Margaret Mead and I really get the sense that this is true about the church.
“Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed, citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.”

I pray that wherever you are, you ask God how you can be used to change your city. Be obedient to Christ and what He would have for your life. I guarantee you that He will do immeasurably more with your life than you could ever do on your own. I will leave you with a quote from David Platt, author of one of my favorite books "Radical".

“Radical obedience to Christ is not easy... It's not comfort, not health, not wealth, and not prosperity in this world. Radical obedience to Christ risks losing all these things. But in the end, such risk finds its reward in Christ. And he is more than enough for us.”

Yearning for Loneliness

"Alone, yet not alone! If it be to glorify my God, I will not grudge to spend many nights alone in such a tree, to feel again my Savior's spiritual presence, to enjoy His consoling fellowship. If thus thrown back upon your own soul, alone, all alone, in the midnight, in the bush, in the very embrace of death itself, have you a Friend that will not fail you then?"

This quote was written by John G. Paton, a missionary to today's Vanuatu in the South Pacific. He writes this when he was all alone after losing his wife and child and now surrounded by hostile natives as he hid in a tree. These words are absolutely breathtaking and make me envious of that close connection with God.

One of the biggest things I am worried about with this move is the feeling of loneliness the first little while when I don't have friends. I am a person that thrives on interactions with other people so this move is totally uncomfortable and scary for me. I know that this is what God wants for my life. He has provided exponentially for me and blessed me in innumerable ways through this whole transition time.

Yet the one thing I keep thinking about is how lonely I will be. I am SUPER blessed with fantastic parents who love the Lord and constantly seek after Him. They truly are my best friends. I have so many amazing friends that are true lights in my life, that encourage me and correct me and speak truth in to my life. I am so sad to think that I can't just call them up to meet for coffee or go on walk.

Yet I think this time will be amazing for my growth with God. I read the words of Paton and see that he has never felt more close to God than when he was completely alone. All the blessings in my life are amazing but when they are blocking my intimacy with Christ, they become idols. Once these luxuries are stripped away, I am praying that God will grow me in ways I could never have imagined!

There are so many examples of people meeting God when they are away from others. Moses on Mount Sinai, Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane. I am not saying that God doesn't show up when we are with others (quite the contrary), but there is something so intimate about being completely alone with your Savior.

So while these next few weeks will be very difficult for me, I pray that God will use this time to let me know Him more. I pray that He will teach me to yearn for Him and then realize that loneliness is such a minor suffering compared to the glory that He will reveal.

I also want to challenge everyone who isn't in a transition period. God will reveal things to you if you take the time to learn them. Making time to be alone is a priority for growth. Whether it be taking an hour or so out of your week to just sit and be with Christ or taking a mini vacation from technology and the world, do it! I pray that you can say with boldness "If it be to glorify my God, I will not grudge to spend many nights alone in such a tree, to feel again my Savior's spiritual presence, to enjoy His consoling fellowship."

Casting My Net to the Right

"Jesus said to them, "Children, do you have any fish?" They answered him, "No." He said to them, "Cast the net on the right side of the boat, and you will find some." So they cast it, and now they were not able to haul it in, because of the quantity of fish." -John 21:5-6

My boat is full. Its overflowing. Capsizing from the amount of fish. And thankfully I can say it is all God's doing. He has supplied and given so much and then some in the blessing department. I have been floating along thinking that I had it all and was doing it all. Then Jesus comes along and says "Hey, lets try it my way just this once and see what happens." WHAM! Blessings beyond compare.

I am so excited to announce that I will officially be moving to New York City in June!! As mentioned in my previous posts, God has been laying this on my heart for a little under a year and half now. I finally surrendered and said "Ok God, do with my life what you will." (If you know me, control is one of the absolute biggest struggles in my life so doing this took A LOT!!!) And God has given me a heart that longs to reach those in NYC. I am so excited about this next chapter in my life.

This whole process has been nothing but blessing after blessing from God. If you ever have doubted the power and supremacy of Christ, let's sit down and have a conversation about this whole process. Many of those close to me have seen me cry and question and wrestle with God over this decision. Yet through the whole process, God has proven Himself more and more faithful (I am so undeserving of this!).

I am so saddened to close this chapter in my life. I am blessed beyond measure with my family, friends, and co-workers. Each and every one of you have shaped me in to who I am today. I look forward to continuing our relationships, just a little bit farther away.

More than anything, I pray as you read this that you realize how much this is God and not me. He has been more than gracious to shower His blessings and grace on me during this time. He has shown me that His will and timing are so much greater than mine. I pray that you would dare to ask God what is next for you. I pray that you would ask Him how you can be used and where you can be used. More than anything, I pray you become closer to Christ. That you are so wrapped up in Him that your life is nothing but a reflection of Him. That your life leads others to Christ, wherever you are!

Listen to Christ and put your net on the other side of the boat!

“Well," said Pooh, "what I like best," and then he had to stop and think. Because although Eating Honey was a very good thing to do, there was a moment just before you began to eat it which was better than when you were, but he didn't know what it was called.” -A. A. Milne (Winnie-the-Pooh)

There is no better quote that embodies my life, my emotions, my thoughts right now. I am so excited about what is to come. I know that no matter what, God is about to do big things. But honestly, I am truly cherishing and loving this waiting time, this anticipation. Right before I am about to eat my coveted jar of honey. This moment.

This post has been prompted by the fact that I am going next week to visit NYC. I am going with 3 dear friends and we are going to explore the city. Two of them have never been and I can't wait to show them the city that has stolen my heart. I get giddy over the thought that this may not be the only time I get to show my friends around the city.

Through this whole process God has been growing me and teaching me so many things. He has been pointing out sin in my life (painful), pushing me to rely totally on Him (comforting), and making me fall in love with the promises in His Word (hopeful). Truly, God has been nothing but faithful to me during this time of transition. I literally can't remember another time in my life where I have been so challenged and pushed in my faith. The process has been painful, agonizing, and many-a-tear have been shed. Yet through it all God has taught me so many valuable lessons.

Reading this may seem like my life has been so terrible-how has this time been sweeter than honey? I have never felt so close to Christ. His goodness. His faithfulness. His hope. God has through His grace given me a new life and I am so excited to show others of this new life. So terrible is not the word. Faithful, gracious, loving are definitely words.

So yes, the future will be amazing. But right now, the moment right before you stick your hand in the jar and eat the honey, this is the time I am treasuring. This is the time that I am growing and learning and falling even more in love with Christ. And I know that God is faithful to not let this be just a moment, a blip in my humdrum life. I know God will continue to grow me and use me.

"A Journey of a Thousand Miles Must Begin With A Single Step"

So my thousand miles has already begun but I know I am barely in to this journey. I am starting this blog as a way for you to keep up with this journey that God is leading me on. This journey is one that is leading me to New York City, to Washington Heights in the upper part of Manhattan. This journey is one that is leading me from the hills of East TN to the busy streets of NYC. This journey is one that only God could have orchestrated, one that has only one compass- Him.

This whole journey started about a year and a half ago when I first started praying about how God would possibly use me after I finished with my 3-year contract at my current job. I was certain that God wanted me to move to some hut in the remote jungles of Africa. And to move to huts, time and preparation are needed. Therefore, I started praying about how exactly all this would come to fruition. And it was in that process that God showed me that He has a completely different plan for me.

During this time of praying and searching, God gave me many signs to let me know that Africa isn't what is in store for me at this time. After prayer and discussion with my accountability partner, she encouraged me to search for other mission opportunities. We looked at the NAMB (North American Mission Board) website, and they were featuring NYC that day. I laughed because to me, being a missionary meant living somewhere you hated, giving up the pleasures of material things, not knowing the language, etc. Never in a million years would God call me to live in a city that my family had come to LOVE over the years. The city my family vacations to. The city that has many sports teams that my family cheers for. The city that is full of culture and life and opportunity that I adored. Never would God call me to somewhere like this. Never.

Wrong. Through much prayer and seeking the wisdom of others in my life, I realized that God is calling me to the city that my heart has loved for many years. God is calling me to minister to the city that my heart yearns for. God has been preparing my heart for this for years. But what would it look like for me to minister to a city like NYC?

The huge focus for NAMB right now is church planting. They are all about living, being, working in a community. Through building community they are urging to plant churches in the cities where Christ is desperately needed. Since I am not a male, not married, and have never been to seminary, I am not necessarily qualified or equipped to start a church. I am however qualified to live in a city, work in a city, live in community in a city, and support a church plant that has already been established in a community.

So that is exactly what I am going to do. I am going to live in the Washington Heights area, work (hopefully) in the Washington Heights area, get to know my neighbors in the Washington Heights area, and go to church in the Washington Heights area. And ALL of this is because of Christ.

I am not one to make a big move like this to a big city, away from my parents, not knowing anyone, taking a huge leap of faith with finances and housing. So all of this is Christ. I am currently in the process of applying/interviewing for a job. There is a certain job that recruiters called me about asking me if they could put my application in for. If it works out, it is TOTALLY a God thing. (I'll let you know more when I find out).

The big thing that God is teaching me in all of this is that He is in control. He knows what is best for us even when it doesn't make sense at the time. He is working all things out to fulfill His ultimate purpose in our lives-to bring Him glory. I pray that through this whole process God is glorified. Even if this is an Abraham-giving-Isaac-as-a-sacrifice type of situation, I pray that I give God all the glory and that I have the faithfulness and willingness of Abraham.

I will close with a quote from one of favorite books. "The will of God is for you and me to give our lives urgently and recklessly to making the gospel and the glory of God known among all peoples, particularly those who have never even heard of Jesus" - David Platt in "Radical"